how to prepare for a hysterectomy*

(in no particular order)

get clear on what is being taken out (uterus and cervix).

prepare yourself for what might also be taken out (ovaries) or for what might’ve been left behind after the last surgery (fallopian tube remnants, scar tissue) and will need clearing away. 

clear your calendar; start telling people that you are unavailable for anything unrelated to your healing, recovery, and transitioning into a new sense of being for the foreseeable future. (be unapologetic about this)

decide that living with adenomyosis until menopause is in your FUCK THAT category of things you’re unwilling to endure. 

buy lots of nightgowns, loose comfy dresses, loose-fitting shirts, no elastic waistbands

remember the goal is to remove the threat(s) & eliminate future risk. 

finish painting for your show in September. 

remember to breathe when reading about vaginal cuff dehiscence. (they say it’s rare, but there was that one woman on tik tok…)

stay off of tik tok. 

remind yourself this is about supporting your longevity.

ask your surgeon as many questions as possible.

plant flower gardens so you have beauty to look at while you recover and as a reminder that your body is blooming anew, too. 

go see your primary care dr. because the pelvic pain is excruciating and your OBGYN is too nonchalant about it for your liking. (don’t forget to follow up on the pelvic floor specialist referral!) 

get more sleep.

be receptive to advice from friends and a few generous strangers who’ve already made it to the other side. 

prepare your family (those “My Hysterectomy Experience” videos on Youtube are clutch) 

talk to the mothers, women, & femmes in your lineage.

eat lighter.

replay memories of your mother’s hysterectomy experience…except that one. you’ll deal with that memory from that moment in time with a therapist later. 

take Motrin for the pain.

make a recovery supplies list and check it twice.

select some books from your To Read pile to finally dive into while recovering. 

soak up the sun.

FEEL YOUR FEELINGS; this is a major life change! (you’re autistic, so things can impact you differently and more intensely than neurotypicals, so adjust your expectations of yourself accordingly) 

do some kind of restorative movement daily

take walks.

test the softness of the hysterectomy pillow you bought from Etsy.

welcome in a new level of self-awareness.

squeeze in final calls & meetings; postpone other projects & plans. 

say yes to an even deeper layer of healing.

reflect on the ways perimenopause has altered your life, health, and perception of Self.

try to manage the flare from your chronic illness. 

give yourself space. 

get your pre-admission blood work & EKG done.

build your recovery spa: snacks, pill organizer, water bottles, chapstick, heating pads, pain relievers & supplements, journals, tarot decks, lego botanical set, post-its, pens/pencils/markers, lotions, portable fan, headphones…

replay the memory of your first period at age 16.

greet the slowly emerging Crone energy with respect, humility, and curiosity.

call the pre-op nurse back.

start the Miralax.

listen to your kids laughing together in the kitchen and thank your uterus for being their first home. 

research hormone therapy options in case you’ll need it. weigh the pros and cons. 

create an action plan for the week before, day of, & in the weeks after. 

just lay in the water and float.

answer the questionnaire.

keep wading through the brain fog with self-compassion.

use up all the bath bombs & bubble bars. 

use the mirror for a search & rescue mission.

welcome the last period of your life with grim determination and an iron grip on hope. 

prepare for a new kind of liberation.

*robotic hysterectomy/bilateral salpingectomy/possible oophorectomy/cystoscopy/possible abdominal incision